BaylyBlog: Out of our minds, too...

Top ten books on sex...

(Tim, w/thanks to Mick) Here's a top-ten reading list for those looking to reform their understanding of the meaning and purpose of the sexes as God created them.

1. Scripture, starting with these texts
2. Henrik Ibsen: A Doll's House
3. Paul King Jewett: Man as Male and Female
4. Stephen B. Clark: Man and Woman in Christ
5. Walter Neuer: Man and Woman in Christian Perspective
6. Steven Ozment: When Fathers Ruled
7. G. K. Chesterton: What's Wrong With the World or The Thing
8. Doug Wilson: Reforming Marriage
9. George Eliot: Middlemarch
10. Ivan Turgenev: Fathers and Sons

Now, ten explanations...

Training your toddler to battle porn...

(Tim) Here's the beginning of a post by Michael Foster from our ClearNote Fellowship Blog:

* * *

The battle against porn starts while your son is still in diapers…

"First steps toward the New Jerusalem..."

(Tim) A couple days ago, Bill Mouser forwarded an article from the London Times, along with a brief comment of his own. I posted them both and they've spawned an interesting discussion of a number of matters, but especially whether the author's incipient repentance is any reason for hope. Note that the issue isn't whether his incipient repentance is spiritual conversion. There's no indication of that at this time.

But if the Holy Spirit works through conviction of sin to draw us to the righteousness of Jesus Christ, we must rejoice when we see others coming to a fuller understanding of their own wickedness accompanied by even the smallest shoot of hunger for the perfections of God--in this case, His Fatherhood from Whom all fatherhood gets its name. Who among us demonstrated perfect understanding or repentance when we first began to see God Himself against the backdrop of the idols we had made and worshiped (still)?

Repentant sodomites aren't unique in failing to understand the self-sacrificial love of Christ for His Bride and therefore the meaning and nature of marriage as God created it. This is an epidemic in the church.

After following the discussion under my post, Father Bill wrote his parish the following letter and I post it here as an example of the sort of generosity and faith...

Of trees and marriage...

(Tim) This from David Wegener who teaches church history, theology, and Scripture at the Theological College of Central Africa under the PCA's Mission to the World. Terri is David's wife and John his son.

* * *

Many days in our rainy season follow a pattern. It is very hot and sunny during the day but toward late afternoon, the sky clouds over and we will have an evening rainstorm. On December 10th it was a little different.

Terri came into my room around 5:30pm and asked if I wanted to let Mr. Robby go home early so he could beat the rain. As I walked outside, Robby was rushing around. I asked if he wanted to go home now and he said he thought he’d stay.

I could tell why. The rain had already started and something sounded like a train coming from over our back fence...

The pleasures of patriarchy, part I...

(Tim) A wise wife and mother writing under the pen name Anne Jones posted The Pleasure of Patriarchy, part I on the ClearNote Blog a few days ago. Here's a teaser.

* * *

Patriarchy has a bad name these days. In most circles, saying of a man, “He’s so patriarchal” can only be topped by saying “He’s such a Neanderthal,” because most 21st-century people, even those within Christ’s own church, assume that patriarchy is not only outdated, but backward, out of touch, and—more to the point—wrong.

Of course, the Holy Scriptures through which God chose to reveal Himself were all penned within the context and limits of patriarchy (which means, literally, “father rule”). He chose to send His Son to a world where women bore and raised babies and men provided for families with the labor of their hands. (Even the most dedicated religious feminist...

Pornography and faith...

(Tim) These wise words were made as a comment under the recent post, Stats on internet pornography, by Alex McNeilly, a young sax student in Church of the Good Shepherd. Thank you, Alex.

* * *

Regardless of how guarded any home is against sin, particularly the sexual sin of the media, in the world opportunities to indulge in it will abound. But even as we build larger and stronger walls against these sins in the home, worldly access to them becomes ever more available as we see in the stats in this post. As a result, I agree with Kevin that the strongest defense against these things lies in the spiritual battle.

We must teach our children the dangers of sexual sin and pornography, so that when they go into the world (a friend's house, a computer lab, a video store, etc.), where there are no guards, their hearts will already be fortified against these iniquities...

How to really love your wife...

(Tim) I've never really thought the authors and speakers dealing with the subject of how to really love your wife hit the truth on the head. More indirect hits, in my judgment.

When Mary Lee and I do pre or post-marital counseling, we use some boilerplate. Two of them we're fond of are "the path to a man's heart goes through his stomach" and "the path to a woman's heart goes through her children."

Most every Lord's day, our church has around ten women listed in the bulletin for prayer because they're bearing an unborn child. Currently, it's twelve--two Mary Lee's and my own grandchildren (Doug and Heather, and Lucas and Hannah are expecting). Also, David and Vanessa Abu-Sara are expecting. This is a pic of David rollicking on their living room floor with their first two. Do you think David owns Vanessa's heart?

The invisible woman...

(Tim) My friend Bob Patterson forwarded a pre-release copy of the Winter 2010 issue of The Family in America: A Journal of Public Policy which he edits, and it's the point of this essay to get you to subscribe. For many years I've been reading this and other publications of what is now called the Howard Center for Family, Religion, and Society, and they've been foundational to my work as a preacher, pastor, and father.

This particular issue's cover article details how, over the past thirty years, homemakers have been forced to subsidize the lives of privilege lived by other women who have forsaken marriage, the home, and childbearing for degrees and professions.

Professional women with salaries high enough to allow them to pay for day care and still turn a profit have not simply been content to leave their homemaking sisters behind, but have built their lifestyle on the backs of those sisters and their hardworking husbands. To anyone who matters, these homemakers are invisible.

Equal Employment Opportunity laws have piled up a legacy of systemic injustice throughout the wage earning world, leaving half the fairer and weaker sex to raise the children the other half will depend upon for their Medicare and Social Security payments when their life of childless privilege is drawing to an end. Meanwhile, the husbands of these housewives and mothers are in free-fall, trying to support the mother of their children as she gives herself to work that, despite those bright boys and girls in Economics Departments, still hasn't shown up on their gross domestic profit tally sheets...

Christmas voices...

Christmas Voices

by Joseph Bayly IV

Joseph

It’s cold and drafty. She’s cold. Why couldn’t the boy have been born while we were still in Nazareth, instead of here, alone, no one to help. Only me, and I’ve never delivered a baby.

Fear not, Joseph.

I do believe God. I take him at his word. A baby. But not mine.

Take unto thee Mary.

Mary—how I love her. I love you, Mary. Here. Hold my hand. I’ll see that nothing goes wrong. No, God will see to that, he’ll take care of you. He’s got to—it’s his baby. Don’t be afraid.

She shall bring forth a son.

He’ll work beside me, help me smooth a yoke, build a house. I’ll get him a little saw, the boy and I will work together...

Hard fathers who raise soft sons, and what to do about it...

(Tim, w/thanks to Jody) Actually, I should have exempted Doug Wilson from my criticism of Reformed pastors just below. One could almost imagine the Roman Catholics granting him an honorary membership. (For the monotones, that was a joke.)

Anyhow, here's an absolutely superb short essay on one of the most tragic failures of fatherhood in our churches, today. Read and copy and give it to those men. Pastors, make yourself useful by promoting Doug Wilson. You could have written it, but you didn't. So credit where credit is due.

Really, Doug Wilson is so endlessly helpful. Sometimes I think of J. C. Ryle.

Fatherhood, the dread of responsibility, and childbearing...

(Tim, w/thanks to Bob and Brian) At church the other day, I was talking with Bob Sands, a young father of ten or twenty (I've lost track), and he mentioned another man in our congregation, Brian Bailey, had sent him a link to a book on Google Book that he'd found very helpful titled The Dread of Responsibility by Emile Faguet.

"The dread of responsibility," I thought, "that's the perfect summary of leaders today--teachers, principals, professors, judges, senators, presidents, and of course, pastors, elders, deacons, fathers, and husbands. All of us have a dread of responsibility."

Bob told me the book emphasized the courage fatherhood required and I was reminded of a quote I've used at times that says something like, "The father of a family is the world's first and greatest adventurer."

So today, I went and read the part of the book Brian had recommended...

Fathers today...

(Tim, w/thanks to Taylor) If you've ever found yourself wondering what thought ran through Bengals wide receiver, Ochocinco's, head when he held one of his four sons (by three different women) in his arms as a newborn, his bio will tell you: "I'm holding a little me." And his view of fatherhood?

"Just having little me's around is cool. No lie."

Another side of President Clinton...

(Tim) Let it never be said Baylyblog had nothing good to say about President Bill Clinton. Just one question, though: if the President wouldn't make the trip to Japan because his daughter would be left home "alone," where was his daughter's mother? Off baking cookies?

He will gently lead the nursing ewes...

A voice says, “Call out.” Then he answered, “What shall I call out?”

All flesh is grass, and all its loveliness is like the flower of the field. The grass withers, the flower fades, When the breath of the LORD blows upon it; Surely the people are grass. The grass withers, the flower fades, But the word of our God stands forever.

Get yourself up on a high mountain, O Zion, bearer of good news, Lift up your voice mightily, O Jerusalem, bearer of good news; Lift it up, do not fear. Say to the cities of Judah, “Here is your God!” Behold, the Lord GOD will come with might, With His arm ruling for Him. Behold, His reward is with Him And His recompense before Him. Like a shepherd He will tend His flock, In His arm He will gather the lambs And carry them in His bosom; He will gently lead the nursing ewes. (Isaiah 40:6-11)

(Tim, w/thanks to Kamilla) One young couple gave birth to their son. They held him and cooed over him and loved him and prayed for him and sang hymns to him until, two hours later, he died. They allowed their pastor to hold their son, too. The beautiful nurses dressed the couple's son in miniature baby clothes they themselves had knit for this and every one of their babies. This was their life--they spent each day in their metro-area preemie unit serving their babies and their babies' mom and dad as they fought, then gave in to death.

After two hours of love, their son died. Mom and Dad asked their pastor to take their son to the funeral home. The pastor took him in his arms. He was dressed in the nurses' homemade clothes and wrapped in a warm blue blanket. Down the stairs and out to the car.

The pastor laid him on the passenger's seat for the twenty-minute drive to the funeral home and wondered at the beauty of these nurses...

An interview with Elisabeth Elliot...

(Tim) During four years in the late nineties and early two-thousands while pastoring Church of the Good Shepherd, I also led the Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood as its Executive Director. My brother, David, joined me in that work and was a great help, designing our first web site and providing invaluable counsel while also serving in the pastorate.

Part of my work was editing CBMW's journal. Periodically, we ran interviews--one being with my hero, Elisabeth Elliot. Naturally, I did the interview myself.

Growing up, the Bayly family had a long personal association with the Howards of Philadelphia--particularly Dave Howard and his sister, Elisabeth Elliot. A couple months ago, Elisabeth's husband, Lars, wrote me telling of a recent trip he and Elisabeth had taken to visit family down in South America. For those of you who know and love them, Lars and Elisabeth are doing well.

So then, here's the interview from CBMW's Journal, Volume 5, No. 1.

* * *

PLAIN AND SIMPLE: AN INTERVIEW WITH ELISABETH ELLIOT

JBMW: We are delighted to be able to speak with you. Why do you think you've been a lightning rod in the evangelical world on this particular issue?

EE: I didn't know I was! I have just proceeded the way I've tried all my life to proceed-by studying what the Bible says and living by it. If I'm asked to talk about it, of course I have a responsibility to talk about it. It is from this that I have learned that I'm not wanted in many circles...

Thoughts on children, death, and eternity (II)...

(Tim) We are examining the teaching of Scripture concern matters related to the state of the souls of children of believers who die in the womb, as infants, or as very young children. And in the course of this discussion, under the first post in this series, Pastor Dave Curell made reference to Calvin’s comments on 1Corinthians 7:14. For the record, here are Calvin’s comments pertinent to this discussion. There’s a reason Calvin is widely recognized as the prince of exegetes. No one comes close to his precision and judicious restraint in explaining Scripture.

After Calvin's comments, we'll pick up our theme as it is opened up by God's Covenant promises and work.

First, then, the text, followed by Calvin's explanation.

And a woman who has an unbelieving husband, and he consents to live with her, she must not send her husband away. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified through her believing husband; for otherwise your children are unclean, but now they are holy.(1Corinthians 7:13, 14)

Verse 14: "For the unbelieving husband is sanctified."

Paul therefore declares here, that marriage is, nevertheless, sacred and pure, and that we must not be apprehensive of contagion, as if the wife would contaminate the husband....

Thoughts on children, death, and eternity (I)...

(Tim) Recently, I've done some reading on the teaching of Scripture concerning children who die early in life, whether in the womb, at birth, or before the age at which they are able properly to discern the body and blood of our Lord Jesus Christ--to examine themselves as they come to His Table.

First, we have to admire the single-mindedness of the Roman Catholics. Although the doctrine of limbo is widely reported to be on life support at the Vatican right now (and I'm sure abortion has played a key role in bringing it into question), we can see they acted on principle in their manufacture of this dogma. (And yes, despite their efforts to deny it, this doctrine has been dogma until now.)

From conception, children are corrupted by Adam's sin; therefore children, too, need to be saved from that corruption if they are to enter Heaven; baptism washes off the corruption of original sin, saving a man; children who die in the womb are not baptized; therefore, children who die in the womb are not saved. Thus such statements as these...

The lost sheep and his shepherds...

(Tim) This is copied from the discussion under an earlier post, "If they desire his help...," and it may be helpful for readers to read that post and discussion, first. But the subject matter of the discussion is so important for the good of the Church and our readers' own souls and families that I'm posting this extended response here, on the main page.

* * *

For the Son of Man has come to seek and to save that which was lost. (Jesus; Luke 19:10)

The issue is simple. Shepherds are gifted, called, and ordained to shepherd a particular flock of particular souls. This means going after the one lost sheep. Jesus our Good Shepherd came after us when we were His enemies and didn't welcome His interest and pastoral care. Remember, He died?

And if you've worked with sheep (or goats or cattle), you know that one lost sheep often is perfectly opposed to being brought back to the sheepfold. Sometimes he must be manhandled to get him to safety. This is the reason David, in Psalm 23, says...

A psalm for Palm Sunday...

(Tim) Back around 1985, Dad and Mud came up for the weekend to the small town in rural Wisconsin where Mary Lee and I were serving a yoked parish of two churches affiliated with the mainline PC(USA). Some years later, we voted to transfer into the PCA and changed our name to Grace Presbyterian Church.

As it happened, that Lord's Day was Palm Sunday and I was preaching on Jesus' Triumphal Entry. During the school year, the drill was Rosedale Presbyterian Church out in the countryside first, greeting the brothers and sisters of that godly congregation prior to worship. Then, worship over and the benediction given, I'd hop in the car and get to town just in time to give the call to worship in the town church.

Paul Vaughn on raising sons...

(Tim) Mary Lee forwarded a link to Moody radio's "Imparting Vision to Our Sons," adding that she was able to catch part of the interview, and that Paul Vaughn gives "a phenomenal plan for raising boys to be men."

Faithful are the wounds of a friend...

(Tim) Yesterday, our text was Matthew 27:1-10, the account of Judas' repentance and suicide. What a terrible end he chose!

Then, this morning, I read the following meditation Michael Foster put up on Facebook and I got thinking about Judas, again. Judas was paid handsomely to betray Jesus and did so by kissing him. The Apostle Paul resisted Peter to his face. Two men and two public actions that shouldn't be hard to interpret. Yet Judas was our Lord's enemy and Paul was Peter's friend. Appearances are deceiving, aren't they?

Here's Michael's helpful post...

It's beyond me how any Christian father can allow his daughter to be a cheerleader...

(Tim) IU's half-naked cheerleaders make a much more prominent appearance at the games when you're there in person than watching on the television. And the prostrating themselves to the IU flag that's a staple of every game at Assembly Hall, it's hard not to think of them as something approximating cult prostitutes. This is one reason Taylor and I love going to IU soccer games. No feminine tease intricately woven between plays. Just straight soccer without interruption for ninety minutes. It's this way with international soccer, too. No cheerleaders. No women giving sideline color. No ads. Just soccer--straight up.

Speaking of which, Taylor passed on this link to an ESPN Page 2 article on a Pentecostal school in southwestern Tennessee where modesty extends to the men's basketball team.

O happy day!

(Tim) If you and the brothers and sisters of your church were regularly standing outside of your local abortuary, offering help to the women going in to kill their little babies, you would have days of God showing His glory and mercy like this account of today's work sent out by the the souls of Church of the Good Shepherd who keep vigil at Bloomington's killing place.

Praise God that He showed mercy on two mothers and their little ones--particularly since today was the thirty-fifth anniversary of the legalization of abortion by the United States Supreme Court who, on January 22, 2009, issued their infamously cruel ruling, Roe v. Wade.

Now, for our correspondent's report on their work this morning here in Bloomington outside Planned Parenthood, saving two babies from being murdered...

Books, a crackling fireplace, and Mother...

(Tim) I have tender childhood memories of sitting in front of the fireplace roasting my back, my two younger brothers lying on the floor falling asleep, while Mud (affectionate diminutive of Mother) read to us. Dad was on the road speaking at conferences much of the time those years, and when he was gone our evenings had a certain leisure. Not that we lived under joyless discipline when Dad was home, but like most men, Dad was sort of daddish.

So the Life without Father routine was that, following dinner and devotions, a fire was built, and as it crackled, Mud read to us by the hour.

Books were the main course in our home, just as they were in the homes of three other families whose children were all growing up at the same time within the same congregation, College Church in Wheaton: the Ken Taylors (Mary Lee's family), the Ken Hansens (ServiceMASTER's founder), and the Hudson Armerdings (Wheaton's prez). All the children of these homes loved to read.

Why?

Because none of our parents were willing...

Carving the turkey, practical jokes, Nathan, and knives...

(Tim) On Thanksgiving, my sorrow over the absence of our brother, Nathan, is most acute. Food and table fellowship were Nathan's specialty.

In his home, I envied his ability to host a meal. Whether lunch or dinner, his enjoyment of his wife, Sandy, their children, the food, the sunshine streaming through their dining room windows, music, and you, his guests, was contagious. He was a gentleman so he told merry jokes. Just before the meal, Nathan clucked over the table, finished off the iced tea, chose the music (usually baroque brass leading up to the meal and something quieter while we sat and talked), took taste tests, spiced up this or that dish, kissed Sandy--oh the Christian joy!

Thanksgivings, too, were the day each year that Nathan pulled out his soapstones and sharpened the knives of whatever home we'd gathered in. He'd work on them in the kitchen. Were they sharp enough, yet? The test was shaving hair off the forearm or a clean vertical cut down through a piece of paper, leaving no ragged edges. (Here's a great account of the growing custom knife business.)

Then it was off to manhandle the turkey. Men do it in our family, but not because we don't cook. Nathan and Dad were both superb cooks, but regardless of the sex of the chefs, carving the turkey was man's work. (Here's a short video on carving the turkey--thanks, Jake.)

Speaking of carving the turkey, back in time to our childhood home for a minute or two. Mud and Dad always had a ton of people for Thanksgiving...

God has chosen the weak things of the world to shame the things that are strong...

(Tim) This is true Christian faith.

The fearful state of proud souls who reject the Church, with a postscript on harsh language from pastors...

(Tim) Few things have been responsible for more souls rejecting Church of the Good Shepherd than our fencing of the Lord's Table according to the requirement of the Presbyterian Church in America's Book of Church Order, that those who come to eat and drink must have placed themselves under the authority of the elders of our church or be a member of some other Bible-believing, evangelical church.

Typically, we surround those words with some explanation of the words' meaning and intent, focusing particularly on the fact that we cannot claim faith in Jesus Christ while rejecting the authority of Christ's Church and her officers which He Himself has commanded us to honor and obey. Whew, do the sparks fly!

Travelling around the country, I've been discouraged to observe how few PCA pastors submit to this Book of Church Order requirement. It's such a good and necessary rule, perfectly suited to drive a dagger into the heart of the cheap grace and hatred of authority at the heart of the reformed church today. So why aren't shepherds faithful to fence the Lord's Table in any other than a pro forma way?

Well, surely the rule has escaped the notice of some. Not every PCA pastor spends his life looking through the Book of Church Order for more rules to obey. Such a life takes a special kind of guy.

And yet, there are many of us who know about this rule and still don't obey it. Why not?

Well, as I said at the beginning, few things have been responsible for more souls rejecting Church of the Good Shepherd than our fencing of the Lord's Table according to this requirement. In other words, most of us don't do it because we don't want to discipline the flock to love and obey the Church and her officers. In a day when Rob Bell is hissing hatred of authority to everyone who will listen, it takes faith and faithfulness to teach, let alone require, submission to authority.

A few years ago, I was part of a lengthy e-mail discussion within our presbytery over whether or not this requirement was biblical. And as the discussion proceeded, the issue went beyond how the Lord's Table should be fenced, to the discussion of church membership itself--is it even biblical?

This afternoon, I was reading Calvin's sermon on 1Timothy 1:1,2 and came across a section that makes our duty clear in this regard. If pastors and elders read this and still allow men and women to come to our Lord's Table while rejecting the Church, her officers and authority...

The Christian home is an acid test of true Christian faith...

(Tim, w/thanks to David Lehr) In a nation where the majority of citizens claim to have "a personal relationship" or to be "living a narrative" with Jesus at the center, how is it that babies keep being murdered at a rate of 1.3 million per year? How is it that women continue to take on more positions in which, by design and intent, they exercise authority over men? How is it that the family meal has died? That what my Dad called "that huckster" now owns the center of our living room and dying room? That no one practices hospitality any more--except possibly at restaurants or hotels? That husbands love internet sluts instead of their beautiful wives? That one fifth of our nation's women now arrive at their early forties never having given birth to a child?

Really, the older I get, the more sense it makes to me that the New Testament epistles place such constant and heavy emphasis on simple (or should I say basic) household matters. Do we really think that killing babies, women sleeping with women and men with men, children defying their fathers, mothers abandoning their children and home for a public life, husbands loving prostitutes instead of the virtuous wife God gave them, wives refusing to submit to their husbands and taking over the leadership of the church, smutty plays and drama and poetry, and spoiled cats and dogs are things unknown in the world of the early Christians?

Iron links between justification for women's ordination and sodomy...

(Tim) My friend James Altena has written this essay which I've found very helpful in understanding the order God gave sexuality. Most helpful is James' explanation of the similarities and differences between attacks Satan has mounted on this order through feminists and sodomites. Of course, publishing this essay should not be taken as indicating that David or I approve (or even understand) every one of its particulars. Similarly, Mr. Altena's allowing it to be posted here is no indication that he endorses everything we've posted. Mr. Altena is Anglican.

Since the first third to half of the essay almost did me in with its technical vocabulary, I want to encourage our readers not to give up, but to persevere. Those who make it through the first half will reap ample rewards in the second, so stick with it!

The Protestant logic of non-procreative hedonism...

(Tim) From Joe Sobran's latest column celebrating the fortieth anniversary of "one of the most prophetic documents of the last century," Humanae Vitae:

* * *

Strange as it may seem, nearly all Christians used to agree that contraception is contrary to God's law.  This began to change in 1930, when the Church of England decreed at its Lambeth Conference that married couples might licitly use contraceptives in cases of hardship. Other Christians were shocked, discerning that the floodgates had been opened by this first fatal concession.

One might mention countless baleful results, such as the current demand for sodomite "wedlock." The real sexual revolution, however, occurred not in the noisy or flamboyant homosexual precincts, but quietly, in the marriage bed. Everything else is an offshoot, a byproduct of the compromise of the marital act, a perversion that has become the norm in the "advanced" countries of the West. In view of this, the perceptive homosexual advocate Andrew Sullivan has gloated, "We are all sodomites now," and he is not far wrong. Gay activists are merely acting out the logic of non-procreative hedonism...

Bob Woodruff shines...

(Tim) Apparently, following the opening ceremony of the Olympics last night, in an interview with Bob Woodruff, Senator John Edwards admitted to a truth that the whole world already knew--that he had "made a mistake" attributable to an overdose of "self-focus" with an actress named Rielle Hunter. God have mercy on Senator and Mrs. Edwards, and their loved ones. Also, Ms. Hunter.

There's so much here instructive to followers of our Lord Jesus Christ. Read the article while comparing Senator Edwards' confession (if you can call it that) to David's found in Psalm 51. Of course, the argument can be made that the content of a confession made to God will always differ significantly from a confession made on Nightline, but the themes should at least be congruent...

Christ Church Ministerial Conference: Father Hunger...

Register now for the Christ Church Ministerial Conference on Father Hunger October 16 & 17 in Houston, Texas. The conference is aimed at pastors, elders, deacons, and those aspiring to the work of these offices. David and I attended  the conference last year and greatly appreciated it. We hope we'll see you there. (From time to time, I'll put this ad back up on the top of the page, so please look below to see if there are other more recent posts. Thanks.)

Chelsea Clinton drawing water at the well...

(Tim) Within the church today, why are we so reticent to recognize sexual distinctions that go beyond God's command or certain "roles" the result of His command? Pastors and elders can bring ourselves to swallow the very specific biblical prohibitions against women serving as elders, and the equally specific commands for wives to submit to their husbands--even going so far as to defend those prohibitions with some small talk of the nature of sexuality (although we always call it "gender" rather than "sex" because gender is a social construct while sex is a hard biological reality); but still, despite this supposed submission to the biblical command, we show a complete absence of any biblical theology of sexuality.

Why? Why are we so chip-on-the-shoulderish when it comes to a discussion of the nature of man and woman beyond the obvious body parts (which are undeniable and very useful for advertising), and certain small aspects of authority in the church and home? Why do we read sexuality in such a mind-bogglingly narrow way? We claim to love diversity, right? So why such a penurious, such a tight-waddish reading of this one so basic to our lives?

A central part of understanding our culture is seeing the hatred for distinctions at its core, and few distinctions are more despised than this one present in the womb from our earliest days--male and female.

Typical believers in Jesus Christ will think we've seen the goodness of sex when we've decided to marry a woman rather than a man...

Covenant children and the emasculation of the church, with a tribute to my father...

…Abraham will surely become a great and mighty nation, and in him all the nations of the earth will be blessed… For I have chosen him, so that he may command his children and his household after him to keep the way of the LORD by doing righteousness and justice, so that the LORD may bring upon Abraham what He has spoken about him. (Genesis 18:18,19)

(Tim) When the Lord entered into a covenant with Abraham, He was pleased for that covenant’s fulfillment to be dependent upon Abraham “command(ing) his children and his household… to keep the way of the Lord….” Still today, it pleases God to use means to accomplish his will, and he has declared the Church should be built up, instructed, and guarded by men—not angels. Where those men are missing or their work is soft and effeminate, the Church has suffered the removal of her vital manhood; she has been emasculated. (n. 1)

When we speak of the emasculation of the church, though, we are not saying she has been robbed of her Bridegroom nor that her adoptive Father has cast her out of his household. Christ is “faithful over God’s house as a son” (Hebrews 3:6 RSV), (n. 2)  and we have his promise that the gates of hell shall not prevail against her. So then, the Church can never be emasculated in any definitive sense, even though her officers may be characterized by a womanly softness and sentimentality.

Such, though, is the church of our time. About twenty years ago I heard Elisabeth Elliot Gren say, “The problem with the church today is that it’s filled with emasculated men who don’t know how to say ‘no’ to a woman.” At the time, I was floored by Elliot’s audacity, but now I realize she was guilty of understatement. Christian men today have a problem saying “no” to almost anyone—not just women. Preachers, elders, and Sunday school teachers place an overwhelming emphasis on the positive and have an almost insurmountable aversion to the negative.

In the mid-eighties, my father was asked to represent the pro-life side at a campus-wide dialogue on abortion held at the Stupe, Wheaton College’s student union. He began his presentation with the statement, “I am not here to represent the pro-life, but the anti-abortion side of this issue..."

Franky's Haming it up again...

(Tim, w/thanks to Mark) Speaking of Senator Obama, Franky Schaeffer's using the current ruckus to kill his father. For the second or third time.

Remember the account of Noah's sons, how the youngest, Ham, saw his father in a drunken stupor and left the tent to broadcast his father's nakedness? How did Noah's two eldest respond?

Father-hunger and pastoral ministry...

Yet most I thank thee, not for any deed,
But for the sense thy living self did breed
That Fatherhood is at the world’s great core.

-George MacDonald (1)

(Tim) Some years back when I first entered the pastorate, I sat in a small-town café listening to the son of a prominent church member summarize his relationship with his father: “Nothing I did ever pleased him.” In his late twenties, the son was a neer-do-well; divorced and not able to hold down a job, his children were shunted back and forth, week-by-week, from one broken home to another.

He came to church only on Christmas and Easter so our breakfast appointment was about the only chance I had. His eyes revealed the last flicker of what once had been the bright flame of father-hunger—that hunger God places in the heart of every son. None of my seminary professors had mentioned this hunger to me and I was at a loss as to how to cure his soul. Not knowing how to respond to this great sadness, I was silent...

The demographics of the PCA: Follow the money...

Then the people of Nineveh believed in God; and they called a fast and put on sackcloth from the greatest to the least of them. (Jonah 3:5)

(Tim) Surrounding his book's arrival on the New York Times bestseller list, Tim Keller's buzz has expanded beyond the PCA. Lots of people trying to put their finger on what makes Pastor Keller brilliant observe that the center of his brilliance is his ability to ask and answer "the questions New Yorkers are asking."

So what questions do New Yorkers ask?

It depends. Which New Yorkers are we talking about? Woody Allen, or the firemen?

Pastors such as Tim Keller and Richard John Neuhaus are speaking to a very narrow segment of New Yorkers--what Peter Berger refers to as "the Information Class" and others call "the Chattering Classes." These are people who make their living writing and editing and publishing and reviewing books. Or, transfer the principle to other segments of the word business--magazines, newspapers, TV, blogs, universities, and courts; together, we are the Chattering Class.

Tim Keller is PCA and we are a class-specific denomination...

Fathers and sons...

(Tim) This VW Jetta commercial (it's the third one in) had both Mary Lee and me laughing out loud. No words needed between this father and daughter--they're on the same wave length. (And yeah, it said "father and son" before, but I'm color blind so chill out. Pink's really hard for me.)

Thanks, Ben, for the link.

Paw-paw, I squeezed the trigger...

(Tim) Some fathers teach their sons how to play basketball or soccer. Others teach them the Westminster Shorter Catechism. But what if your tenth grandfather is Davy Crockett?

Five year old Tre Merritt was taught to shoot and he just bagged his first four hundred and forty-five pound black bear.

Git doooown!

(Thanks, Taylor.)

All's well in the world...

Truly I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child will not enter it at all. (Mark 10:15)

(Tim) My son-in-law just sent an E-mail telling me I "must" read this post by my nephew, Chris Taylor. He was right. My heart welled and my eyes teared. How we need such fathers and sons to quell the wave of father-hunger and hatred rolling across our land.

God bless you, Isaiah--bless you real good.

Korean Presbyterian and PCA Mission to the World women as martyrs...

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her… (Ephesians 5:25)

(by Tim) In the discussion of the current suffering and martyrdoms of our Korean brothers and sisters in Afghanistan, Valerie comments:

Here’s a thought I offer rather tentatively: What concerns me is… that the great majority of the (Korean) group’s members are women. Yes, we are all soldiers of the cross, but St. Paul didn’t take a wife on his journeys because of the danger.…

I’m reminded of an account I received a few years ago from a dear friend who is a pastor in my denomination, the Presbyterian Church in America. My friend recounted an experience he and his wife had while going through cross-cultural training under Mission to the World, the PCA’s mission agency. (MTW had subcontracted the training out to a company that specialized in providing this service to a number of evangelical mission organizations.)

Here's my friend's E-mail describing one day's training in which all the missionary candidates were captured by terrorists who then demanded that each group of missionaries provide volunteers to be executed. What follows is the account of the ensuing battle among the missionaries over whether Christian fathers should bear the primary responsibility of danger and death, or whether mothers should die so that fathers could live...

Sen. Obama vs. Sen. Clinton: "If everyone is family..."

From a profile of Senator Barack Obama in the latest (05/07/07) New Yorker, here's an excerpt dealing with Sen. Obama's father who left his wife and son, eventually returning to Kenya to work in the government.

Innocence, freedom, individualism, mobility--the belief that you can leave a constricting or violent history behind and remake yourself in a new form of your choosing--all are part of the American dream of moving west, first from the old country to America, then from the crowded cities of the East Coast to the open central plains and on to the Pacific. But this dream, to Obama, seems credulous and shallow, a destructive craving for weightlessness. When Obama, as a young man, went to Kenya for the first time and learned how his father's life had turned out--how he had destroyed his (government) career by imagining that old tribalisms were just pettiness, with the arrogant idea that he could rise above the past and change his society by sheer force of belief--Obama's aunt told him that his father had never understood that, as she put it, "if everyone is family, no one is family." Obama found this striking enough so that he repeated it later on (in his book), in italics: If everyone is family, no one is family.

Universalism is a delusion. Freedom is really just abandonment. You might start by throwing off religion, then your parents, your town, your people, and your way of life, and when, later on, you end up leaving your wife or husband and your child, too, is seems only a natural progression.

Contrast the statement of Senator Obama's aunt, "If everyone is family, no one is family," with the title of Sen. Hillary Clinton's book on childrearing, It Takes a Village. Joe Sobran's response to Sen. Clinton's book was something like, "In the city, the village is a gang."

At least on the issue of family policy, Senators Obama and Clinton seem to be poles apart.

From Dad's "Psalms of My Life"...

A Psalm on Being

The little child says
Here I am daddy
as he bursts
on father's sight
from behind the chair
where he's been hiding.
He doesn't say
What can I do for you?
How can I help you?
I want to serve you
seeking somehow
to work and gain
the father's favor
and delight.
He knows that they are his
without exhausting effort
to achieve.
They are his always.
Here I am daddy
--Abba Father--
not working
just being your eternal son.

-Joe Bayly

Patriarchy? Unnh, unnh.

A friend directed me to a mini-discussion of feminism on a PCA blog. Surprise, surprise: we learn once more that though feminism may be bad, patriarchy is worse.

PCA pastor Phil Ryken writes,

There are errors on both sides of a biblical view of godly male leadership in the home and in the church. Authoritarian, domineering men who stifle the gifts of women -- or worse, who use their stength or their position to legitimate verbal, physical, or other forms of abuse -- are a reproach to the church and stand in opposition to the ministry of Christ.

Indeed, this is one of the reasons I am in strong support of the Danbury Statement produced by the Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood: it is zealous to protect men and women from ungodly patriarchy.

I say "patriarchy" because the connotations of the word make me reticent to use it as the first-choice term to describe the biblical view of male leadership.

Typically I use terms like "servant leadership" or "spiritual authority," but never "patriarchy." To me the term would always need careful qualification because for many people today it already suggests the kind of overreaching use of authority that the biblical position opposes.

Sadly, this amounts to a staunch defense of male headship within the PCA: five apologies, four qualifications, three reservations, two reproaches of those who venture further and one whimpered admission. (It's not the foes of male headship within the PCA who convince me that the PCA will be as feminist as the PCUSA in another generation, it's the professed friends.)

Rick Phillips, a PCA pastor I respect and whose hospitality I've enjoyed, responds to Ryken on the same blog:

...I (too) am actually a bit reserved about the application of the term "patriarchy" to masculine leadership today. The reason I brought it up in an earlier post is that the book in question declares biblical patriarchy to be a sin. This is clearly wrong. But patriarchy is not the term I would most prefer for godly male leadership today, mainly because it too easily down-loads social arrangements that do not possess an enduring biblical mandate. If we want to highlight the permanent and enduring aspects of God's social ordering, it helps if we do not mix them up with those aspects that are not permanent and enduring. To me, at least, patriarchy is so associated with, well, the patriarchs, that it may not be the best term for our present use. Nothing wrong with Abraham and his boys, of course. It's just that the kind of male leadership demanded by the New Testament does not seem to incorporate all the social privileges and obligations that Abraham held.

Neither man seems to grasp the fundamental model for male leadership in Scripture....

Ryken thinks male leadership is based on the "servant leadership" (a term as rooted in eastern mysticism as Biblical teaching) of Jesus Christ. Yes, we all must agree that Christ's role as Head of the Church is Scripture's model for husbands in marriage. But is the Headship of Christ over the Church the sum total of what we learn of manhood from the life of Christ? What about Christ's role as King of heaven and earth? What about Christ's warrior triumph over His enemies? Are "servant leadership" and "spiritual authority" ALL we learn of perfect manhood from the life of Christ?

And though Rick Phillips is less embarrassed of Biblical masculinity than Ryken (he writes at one point, "the best remedy for feminism is a good dose of masculinity"), he too seems unsure of the ultimate Scriptural referent for male leadership when he writes, "the kind of male leadership demanded by the New Testament does not seem to incorporate all the social privileges and obligations that Abraham held."

In fact, Rick is right. Biblical manhood's foundation isn't Abraham. Patriarchy (or "father rule") is rooted in the nature of God the Eternal Father. We may as well apologize for the social privileges and obligations of God the Father as apologize for permitting Abraham's position to influence our understanding of male headship.

In fact, the headship of Christ over His Church is not the model Scripture routinely holds up for manly leadership. Complementarians focus exclusively on Christ to avoid confronting culture. But the mandate for manhood begins in the character of God. Reduce manhood to the life of Christ and we have no template for understanding fatherhood.

New Testament Scripture, indeed the teaching of Christ Himself, points time and again to the Father as our paradigm. Jesus argues from the nature of human fatherhood to the Fatherhood of God when He urges prayer: "What father gives his son a scorpion when he asks for a loaf of bread?"). We're told in Hebrews that just as earthly fathers discipline children, so the Heavenly Father disciplines all He accepts as sons.

The poverty of the "complementarian" position (and the PCA is complementarian at best in its approach to sexuality) is that it denies the Father by affirming only the Son.

Even Karl Barth was more orthodox in his view of Biblical manhood than the typical PCA pastor today....

Christian men at the city gates...

Not in our county!

On our way to a family reunion in Bristol, Tennessee, my wife, Mary Lee, our children Hannah and Taylor, and I passed this pornography store next to the southbound I-65 entrance ramp at the Indiana State Road 250 exit, just south of Seymour. We stopped and talked with the men picketing the store and expressed our appreciation for their work. These brothers have two tactics: first, they have signs all over the place telling prospective patrons that if they patronize the store their picture will be taken, posted on the internet, and sent to their employer (if they're a truck driver).

The warning, prominently displayed.

Kelvin Sampson: Happy Father's Day, early...

After reading the earlier post on Indiana University basketball, Brandon Dutcher, a fellow member of the Presbyterian Church in America, posted this comment which seemed best not to leave buried in the comments section. Thanks, Brandon, for adding your thoughts. This is a good encouragment to all of us to be better fathers. Happy Father's Day, early!

As a lifelong Sooner fan (and a PCA Presbyterian), I am disappointed in Coach Sampson for breaking the rules. Yet I have to say I genuinely like the guy and wish him the best at IU. I can promise you he does have some redeeming qualities, as you'll see if you read the column I have shamelessly inserted below. So give him a chance. Perhaps things will turn out better than you think.

-Brandon Dutcher

Father-Son Camp: It's About Time

[This column was published on Father's Day 2003 in The Sunday Oklahoman.]

This is the third Father's Day in a row that I've woken up sore.

But it's worth it, because I love spending time with my 10-year-old son at Kelvin Sampson's annual Father-Child Basketball Camp, held on the University of Oklahoma campus over Father's Day weekend.

Lincoln and I are among the 100-plus campers living in Walker Tower, eating at the Couch Cafeteria and playing ball in the Sooners' extraordinary practice facility adjacent to the Lloyd Noble Center. We practice our shooting and ball-handling, engage in sadistic stretching exercises, and battle other father-son combos in the two-on-two "Cutthroat" competition.

In a recent interview, Sampson told me he first got the idea for a father-son camp while running summer camps as a young head coach at Montana Tech. He even participated with his own son, Kellen.

Spurgeon on "The Men" of Scotland...

We used to have in our Baptist churches substantial men who would as soon have brooked Satan at their own table as an unsound preacher in the pulpit. There used to be a company in the north of Scotland called "The Men." Why, if heresy had been preached before them, they would have been as provoked as Janet Geddes when she threw her cutty stool at the head of the preacher. They would not have endured these modern heresies as the present effeminate generation is enduring them. Let the new theologians have liberty to preach what they like on their own ground, but not in our pulpits.

Alas! the leading members in many churches are Christians without backbones, molluscous, spongy; snails I would call them, only they have not the consistency of a snail's shell. They are ready to swallow any mortal thing if the preacher seems clever and eloquent. Cleverness and eloquence--away with them forever! If it is not the truth of God, the more cleverly and eloquently it is preached the more damnable it is. We must have the truth and nothing but the truth, and I charge the fathers in Christ all over England and America to see to this. Get ye to your watchtower and guard the flock, lest the sheep be destroyed while they are asleep.

-Spurgeon, "Fathers in Christ," Metropolitan Tabernacle Pulpit Vol. 29.

(Thanks, Chris.)

Harvey Mansfield on manliness...

Pastor Erik Braun has a post on an interview of Harvey Mansfield done by feminist Naomi Wolf. Mansfield is the author of the new book, Manliness, which has been getting a lot of press.

Braun also points us to an article by Mansfield titled, "Is Manliness Optional," that appeared in The American Enterprise.

Speaking of diapers, Luther says...

This weekend, my good wife, Mary Lee, sent this by Martin Luther to a young father just blessed by the safe birth of his fourth child:

Now observe that when that clever harlot, our natural reason . . . , takes a look at married life, she turns up her nose and says, "Alas, must I rock the baby, wash its diapers, make its bed, smell its stench, stay up nights with it, take care of it when it cries, heal its rashes and sores . . . ?

What then does Christian faith say to this? It opens its eyes, looks upon all these insignificant, distasteful, and despised duties in the Spirit, and is aware that they are all adorned with divine approval as with the costliest gold and jewels. It says, O God, because I am certain that thou hast created me as a man and hast from my body begotten this child, I also know for a certainty that it meets with thy perfect pleasure. I confess to thee that I am not worthy to rock the little babe or wash its diapers, or to be entrusted with the care of the child and its mother. How is it that I, without any merit, have come to this distinction of being certain that I am serving thy creature and thy most precious will? O how gladly will I do so, though the duties should be even more insignificant and despised. Neither frost nor heat, neither drudgery nor labor, will distress or dissuade me, for I am certain that it is thus pleasing in thy sight. . . .

God, with all his angels and creatures is smiling--not because the father is washing diapers, but because he is doing so in Christian faith.

I might add that last night our church had a number of Christmas parties in separate homes, each home hosting three small groups. Mary Lee and I hosted, with our small group, one of those parties here in our home, and I was inspired by the sheer number of children inside, outside, upstairs, and downstairs for four plus hours. What fruitfulness God has blessed us with!

But also, I was inspired by the loving care those children received from their mothers and fathers. One father in particular held his crying baby and, as the little one screamed, he told me how God is using his children's needs to teach him humility. I was humbled listening to him and thank God for the testimony of godliness that surrounds me.

Men Leading Worship....

A strong argument on a questionable debate topic on the PCA news site here by Jeff Meyers.

Jeff suggests the following as the primary reason for male leadership in the fundamental tasks of worship:

...pastors are called to speak and represent the Husband Christ to the Bride, the church. If we continue to marginalize the pastor in the liturgy of the church, we will increasingly wonder why women cannot be ordained as well as men. If women are going to read Scripture, lead portions of the service, etc., then the whole purpose of ordination will be lost....

Ordination is to a role, something a man does, not merely to a status or "profession." It gives him the authority to say and do things in the Lord's Name. Otherwise stated, the minister has an instrumental, ritual-symbolic function in the church service. He represents the Husband to the Bride. He acts for Jesus. He speaks for Jesus. He is authorized so to act and speak. And everybody should know it. This is key....

This is why the pastor who leads worship must be an ordained man. By virtue of his office, he must represent the Husband to the Bride. A woman cannot do so. It would upset the entire fabric of God-ordained role relationships within the church and home. The symbolism of male headship must be maintained in the corporate liturgy of the church.

Why female ordination is a topic of debate on the PCA's By Faith web site I don't understand. But Jeff's comment may redeem what seems otherwise an exercise in kicking at the foundations.