BaylyBlog: Out of our minds, too...

Do the French have a secret in their mothering and fathering...

If you're a mother or father, read this article. And note the last couple of paragraphs carefully. Over and over again, I tell mothers and fathers of undisciplined children that their rebuke and discipline of their sons and daughters lacks conviction. Firmness. Acting as if they mean what they say rather than that they're mourning having to put up boundaries, as they say. Then I tell them to watch the Dog Whisperer and note how much of Cesar Milan's success is simply a function of his being completely integrated as he looks at the dog. He doesn't apologize for his authority, but exercises it.

If you're a mother or father, again I tell you: read this article. You have no authority because you have chosen to have no authority and your precious little one's got your number.

And while we're on the subject, the principles in the linked article are applicable to elders and the souls under their care, also. Pastors and elders who don't want authority aren't respected--just as they wish. And that may seem to be no big deal until you realize the authority we're trading away is not ours.

It is God's. Fathers and mothers of the home and church have been delegated authority and will be judged by their use of it in the training and protection of the souls God has entrusted to them. (TB, w/thanks to Lucas)

Joseph Maraachli and the state's usurpation of parental authority...

Joseph Maracchli was the subject of an intense right-to-life battle in Canada last spring. Sadly, a couple months ago he died at his parents’ home in Windsor, Ontario. He was 20 months old. Andrew Henry wrote about Joseph on Baylyblog back in March. You may review the details here.

The number of similar cases will explode in coming months and years and there are important lesssons Christian fathers and mothers should learn. God has given parents the natural affection and compassion for their own children that no doctor can truly have no matter how highly trained or respected he may be.

This is not to say that parents are incapable of being neglectful of their children, but it's the exception rather than the rule. God’s good gift to children is parents who are loving and tender toward them.

The ever-increasing power and authority of government in our lives can only produce bad fruit, and the belief that a well-paid and benevolent bureaucracy can make better decisions than parents is wicked...

Ugh, it's Christianity Today, again--this time weighing in against spanking...

Knives are necessary to cut meat and bread. Every once in a while, knives are used to kill people. Can we all agree knives aren't the problem? Please? Pretty please?

The abuse of a thing does not invalidate its proper use.

This truth has eluded the editors of Christianity Today. In a recent editorial they use the death of several children at the hands of their fathers and mothers as the spectre to soften readers up to their dogma that "corporal punishment ...should be employed miles short of abuse, without anger, and as an absolute last resort." From their perch in Moses' seat, these scribes declare about spanking that "the Bible does not require it" (emphasis in the original).

Think about this. The magazine that purports to be the voice of Biblical inerrancy and Christian faith in these United States has run an editorial declaring that the rod of discipline God Himself requires God Himself does not require. And if that sentence confuses you, all I can say is I couldn't figure out how to put it more clearly.

And if you're one of the pigheaded ones who balks against progress, just be sure you only use the rod as "an absolute last resort." 

But the Bible commands us to use the rod. God requires it...

The death of an eighteen-year-old brother...

The LORD is good to those who wait for Him, To the person who seeks Him. It is good that he waits silently For the salvation of the LORD. It is good for a man that he should bear The yoke in his youth. Let him sit alone and be silent Since He has laid it on him. Let him put his mouth in the dust, Perhaps there is hope. Let him give his cheek to the smiter, Let him be filled with reproach. For the Lord will not reject forever, For if He causes grief, Then He will have compassion According to His abundant lovingkindness. (Lamentations 3:25-32)

(NOTE: Since posting this a few hours ago, I've made a couple corrections and added some text at the end.) Back in 1964, my brother, Joe, went off to Swarthmore on a (rare) full ride National Merit Scholarship. He was a philosophy major, ran on the Cross Country team, and loved the Lord. He planned to go on for a Ph.D. and serve in foreign missions.

Meanwhile Dad...

Francis Schaeffer's shame...

He who corrects a scoffer gets dishonor for himself, And he who reproves a wicked man gets insults for himself. Do not reprove a scoffer, or he will hate you, Reprove a wise man and he will love you. (Proverbs 9:7, 8)

In what world is it news when a man announces his Christian faith and leadership were only for the money and that he "faked it all the way?" In the Gray Lady's world where hypocrisy among pro-life Evangelicals is news fit to print because it somehow confirms their self-righteousness in promoting the slaughter of little ones and hating God.

My own father knew the elder Francis Schaeffer (they both attended Faith Seminary) and near the end of his life he became concerned about the anger and pride that characterized Franky's splenetic diatribes. So back in the early eighties, Dad wrote Franky a kind fatherly letter of admonishment. Franky never responded.

Years later, now, I'm in my late fifties and I realize how awful pride is and how very many nations, cities, churches, families, marriages, and men it destroys. It is the engine that drives that root of bitterness that corrupts many.

This is my way of saying that the real news about Franky is not that he's now confessing his whole life has been hypocrisy...

Church officers and fathers who cover up sexual crimes...

"Fathers need to know this: avoiding the potential shame by not providing justice for your daughter is a cowardly act that will be forever remembered..." - longtime PCA elder and father of little daughters just found to have been raped by a relative

Here's an e-mail we received responding to the post "With the souls of sodomites destroyed, children are next...". As you will see, the e-mail is filled with horrors--particularly the horror of Christians who refuse to recognize the horrors taking over our homes and churches and to respond to them Biblically.

Since posting this and the previous piece, it's become clear to me that readership of this post has been small. And I believe this means sexual sin and the rampant fornication and pornography that are its seedbed will live on in the church, gaining ground while church officers and household fathers abandon their flocks and talk exchange blog posts and comments about family-centered churches and post-millenialism.

The predators love this.

So please, look again at the pull-quote at the top and ask yourself if you and your church officers are beyond it? If you're such good fathers, pastors, elders, deacons, and Titus 2 women that you don't need to find out what it means or how to respond to this failure of fathers filling our churches with bitterness? I'm sure no one relishes reading such a rebuke, but then do we really think the Corinthians enjoyed the Apostle Paul's letters?

Note particulary the father's statement about the cowardice of fathers who try to cover up the crime rather than protecting their children. This is the reality of my pastoral experience, over and over again. Our session submits the criminal to the civil magistrate. Always. Immediately. And so must you.

Living in a university community, over many years, now, ClearNote Church has been blessed by God with a good number of opportunities to be servants of reconciliation in these tragic circumstances. We would be pleased to serve your church's officers by providing support and counsel when you need help with sexual abuse and crimes against our Lord's little ones. Please feel free to contact us.

Now, on to the account...

Social security is D.C.'s cash cow...

The American Spectator's "Another Perspective" just ran an excellent piece titled, "What Would Reagan Cut?" The author is Bob Patterson, a close friend who served as the stated clerk of Northern Illinois Presbytery (PCA) back in 1991 when I transferred with my congregation from the mainline PC(USA) into the PCA. Since then, Bob has moved into writing on public policy matters and currently serves as editor of the Rockford Center's very helpful quarterly, The Family in America.

Two reasons to read this piece: first, everyone thinks cutting Social Security benefits is the only realistic way to address the deficit, but did you know that the payments you and I make into Social Security have long served as one of Washington D.C.'s principal cash cows? Bob reports that Social Security has long been producing a surplus...

With the souls of sodomites destroyed, children are next...

Hazael said, “Why does my lord weep?” Then he answered, “Because I know the evil that you will do to the sons of Israel: their strongholds you will set on fire, and their young men you will kill with the sword, and their little ones you will dash in pieces, and their women with child you will rip up.” (2 Kings 8:12)

Time and again, those who pastor souls are called by God to enter into the havoc and destruction caused by the sexual depredation of children. Sometimes it's the children themselves who initiate the sin; other times it's an older relative or some unrelated adult, both male and female. One tragic aspect of this ministry is watching how often sexualized children grow up into bondage to sexual perversion, themselves. Little boys molested by older boys or men grow up desiring men rather than women.

This simple fact needs to be forced out of the closet, into the light...

Tilting at windmills...

Over on a conservative Reformed blog, a couple men have been arguing that the church today is being threatened by some who are taking father-rule (they call it "patriarchy") too, too far. No one really wanted to be specific, but when pressed by the esteemed brothers Craig French and RCJr., the following list of practices was submitted as proof of this grave threat.

We are told that the men who pose this threat within the Church are those "suggesting..."

Government-gone-hog-wild: keep your eye on the bill...

The battle over money going on between President Obama and the House of Representatives is worth watching because, for years to come, it will be used as an example proving something. Just ask Newt Gingrich.

Exactly what it proves remains to be seen and is largely a function of the degree to which those of us who oppose government-gone-hog-wild make our voices heard in support of what the freshman class and Speaker Boehner are trying to do.

So, good citizens, speak up.

Last night in his plea for support of unlimited government, President Obama said:

Most Americans, regardless of political party, don't understand how we can ask a senior citizen to pay more for her Medicare before we ask corporate jet owners and oil companies to give up tax breaks that other companies don't get.

To understand such deceptions...

Impeach the judges...

The substance of this post is the text of a recent e-mail discussion I was copied on between two friends of Baylyblog--one a prof and the other an attorney employed as a civil magistrate. Note particularly this statement in the first half of the discussion: "our biggest worry is of a corrupt government whose police violate our civil rights."

There's no doubt this should be the greatest concern of believers, today.

Christians consistently have failed to recognize that every accretion of power and authority to the civil magistrate comes at the expense of the authority and freedom of the mediating institutions of the Church and family, not simply the freedom of the individual. Typically, political conservatives worry only about individual liberty, but the freedom to obey Scripture and exercise authority in the Christian home and Church is under sustained attack, also, and is every bit as serious a usurpation of authority as our loss of individual freedom.

God has ordained authority in the households of the home and Church, and the denial of freedom to those institutions to govern themselves according to Scripture is growing year by year and is a central part of the decline of the West we have experienced. Yet sadly, there has been almost no warning given by our church and home fathers.

The State is our Savior-Protector/Provider and the more dependent the State renders her citizens, the more those citizens will place their faith in the god of the state rather than their own personal gods. And so we arrive at the place where America's most popular gods, whether Mormon, Roman Catholic, or Protestant, pose no particular threat to the state's bipartisan and unilateral commitment to destroy any person or institution blocking the path to her glorious dominion...

Must a gay man go straight?

Under another post, a longtime reader named Jay asks a question that seems worth answering on the main page.

* * *

Dear Jay,

Answering a question like this by writing rather than in person is very difficult, pastorally. How can I show you I love you and am very concerned that you know the mercy of God for your particular set of temptations, especially in a time and place when any condemnation of sodomy is seen as at least shrill, and likely smug, insensitive, and grounded in self-righteousness, to boot?

Still, I will work to answer you because you say others are unwilling to do so, and because you are a precious soul belonging to the Lord of us all Who bought us each with His Own Blood and has called us to be holy as He is holy. If you want, I can put you in touch with those struggling with your particular set of temptations who are a part of our church here in Bloomington and you may ask them if what I write here is from love or censoriousness? You may ask whether you’d find our church to be loving of all regardless of their particular besetting sin, or loving only of those with more acceptable besetting sins?

So on to the difficult work others have avoided.

You wrote, “I would not consider myself heterosexual at all. Is being straight a requirement?”

Let’s clarify the question. The opposite of straight is gay, so another way of asking the question would be, “My psychological and emotional identity and inclinations are completely homosexual, so can I be give in to them as long as I don’t go all the way?” Or another way of saying it would be, “May I give myself to gayness rather than straightness in everything but physical intercourse, and will this please God?”

The answer is...

The sinner's prayer...

This article by Dad (Joe Bayly) was published in his monthly column, "Out of My Mind," which ran for twenty-five years in Eternity magazine. Originally published in December 1966, the article was titled, "Is There a Parallel Between Infant Baptism and Early Decisions for Jesus?"

* * *

Have you ever considered the possibility of a parallel between infant baptism or "confirmation," on the one hand, and early "decisions for Christ" on the other?

Most of us evangelicals fear an act of religious formality early in life that may be trusted in the absence of conversion. “Of course I’m a Christian—I was confirmed at the age of twelve” rings an alarm in our minds. But “Of course I’m a Christian—I raised my hand in a children’s meeting” doesn’t set off the same alarm.

Some parents and teachers go even further, trying to convince the doubting teen-ager that he’s really a Christian, because “you asked Jesus to come into your heart in the primary department.” Assurance comes from the adult who remembers an act, rather than from the Spirit who may—or may not—indwell the life.

Not all doubts are bad....

The Sacraments belong to the Church...

Now since this charge is expressly given to the apostles along with the preaching of the word, it follows that none can lawfully administer baptism but those who are also the ministers of doctrine. When private persons, and even women, are permitted to baptize, nothing can be more at variance with the ordinance of Christ, nor is it any thing else than a mere profanation. - Calvin on Matthew 28:16-20

Increasingly, the session of ClearNote Church of Bloomington has been receiving applicants for membership who have been baptized by Cru girlfriends, their parents, a parachurch aquaintance, or almost anyone other than a church officer administering the Sacraments as a fulfillment of his office.

We've worked through this carefully, finally coming to the conclusion that baptisms done privately by friends and relatives are not true baptisms. There are many issues, here, and the arguments are long and involved, but at the end of it there was no doubt in our minds that the Sacraments are given by our Lord to the Church--not to individuals and families--and that to be a fulfillment of our Lord's commands, they must be administered by the officers our Lord has called and set apart to lead His Church.

For those with ears to hear...

More heresy from Baker's wolves...

I know that after my departure savage wolves will come in among you, not sparing the flock; and from among your own selves men will arise, speaking perverse things, to draw away the disciples after them. (Acts 20:29-30)

Look what Baker Book House makes its living from today. Professor Alan G. Padgett has written a book blasphemously titled, As Christ Submits to the Church, claiming it's a "biblical understanding of leadership and mutual submission."

The marketers tell us the author is a "theologian" with the terminal degree from Oxford. Did you know how easy it is to get into Oxford for grad studies in theology? Every other applicant gets accepted.

The pic on the book's cover tells us the contents are simply the outworking of Jesus' Upper Room command to wash one another's feet. Very olde truths, don't you know?

Then this:

As Christ submits to the church, so all Christians must submit to, serve, and care for one another. Padgett articulates a creative approach to mutual submission and explores its practical outworking in the church today, providing biblical and ethical affirmation for equality in leadership. Professors and students in practical theology and gender courses, pastors, church leaders, and thoughtful lay readers will appreciate his new approach to a controversial topic.

Where to begin? "Christ submits to the church?"

No. Scripture says no such thing, but rather the opposite:

But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything. (Ephesians 5:24)

The Church submits to Christ--He doesn't submit to the Church!

These heretics turn everything upside down...

The economics of feminism...

Sooner or later every faithful pastor joins the resistance movement engaged in mortal combat with the Feminist Reich. At long last, the shepherd finds it impossible to live seated in the heavenlies far above the screams and bloody carcasses rotting in our public squares and churches. Hell and destruction get to be too much for him, so he puts on his armor, grabs the Sword of the Spirit, and marches out to destroy the Devils of Hell whose mouths are dripping the blood of the sheep. War is finally declared and the shepherd marches out in defense of his flock!

As he enters the battle, though, it dawns on him that economics is one of the key battlefields. Yet he's never learned a thing about economics...

One marshmallow, two marshmallows..

Son-in-law Ben reports there was a study done in the sixties showing that the children who knew how to postpone gratification did better academically and committed fewer crimes in later years. I'll bet the correlation with avoiding fornication is even stronger.

If anyone can find the link to the study, please post it. Meanwhile, here's a cute video.

(TB)

Pleasure or pain: which would you choose?

Here's an excellent article by Brian Carpenter that's filled with wisdom for all of us, but particularly those of us learning how to raise our children in the Lord. Read it. Then ask your wife and children to read it and discuss it around your dinner table.

(TB: w/thanks to David W.)

Home schoolers split over Ken Ham and Peter Enns...

(Tim) When I was younger, I used to say the homeschooling movement was one of the most encouraging signs in America, today.

Government has no business engaging in religious instruction, yet public schools do almost nothing else. Through the training and certification of government school teachers, education's oligarchs rule public schools with an iron fist and they are determined to wrest the minds and hearts of children away from their fathers.

My parents graduated from Wheaton College back in the forties and one of their friends went to Columbia University to get his doctorate. He reported Columbia's faculty and grad students were committed to using government schools to foment rebellion in the home, telling of a party in celebration of John Dewey's ninetieth birthday at which faculty and grad students discussed the utility of government schools for undermining parents' efforts to pass their religious commitments on to their sons and daughters. Their plan was simple: they would train public school teachers to serve as front-line missionaries for the godless paganism sold to the parents of government schoolchildren as "separation of church and state."

This and other things led to my parents working with several couples to start a new Christian school outside Philadelphia called Delaware Country Christian School. Mary Lee and I followed in their footsteps, joining with a few couples here in Bloomington to start Lighhouse Christian Academy. Before we finish educating our children we'll have used Christian schools, a Christian college, a public university, a secular college, public schools, home school, and a home school co-op.

What education do we think is best?

Three helps for fathers...

(Tim) Fathers, let us live by faith as we do the work of raising our sons and daughters. It's hard--very hard, particularly if you're going for the heart rather than external conformity. At times your dear wife will be an obstacle to your work. Let's be honest about that.

When I first put up this post, I considered it so boringly normal in its description of the father/mother/child disciplinary triad it didn't occur to me anyone might think the scenario was current in my home. But a dear friend wrote to warn me not to talk about my wife and son in public and I was grateful.

That said, this is not my current situation. Mary Lee is not leading a rebellion and our son Taylor is not sullen.

On the other hand, I'm always loathe to turn down the heat on instruction and exhortation by reassuring my congregation this or that wasn't meant to describe me or you or him or her. So let me reverse myself and say this post does apply to me, my wife, my son, you, your wife, and your daughter. In other words, no one is off the hook as we read this. Here are some of our sins and all of us need to take warning and encouragment from the Word of God. That said...

Nationalized health care and parental authority...

(Andrew Henry) The conflict over Joseph Maraachli throws into stark relief our modern age's attack on the authority of fathers and mothers.

The circumstances are simple and painful. Several years ago, Moe Maraachli and Sana Nader lost their daughter, Zina, to a degenerative neurological condition. Her respiratory function deteriorated so severely that she was placed on a ventilator. Rather than allowing her to die in the hospital, her parents decided to take her home. A simple tracheotomy allowed her to breathe without the aid of a ventilator and she lived for six more months at home with her family before passing away.

Fast forward several years to the birth of Joseph. He was considered to be at high risk for the same genetic condition and was closely monitored as he grew. At four months old, he began having seizures and his parents worst fears were confirmed...

"Suzy did not want a leader for a husband..."

(Tim, w/thanks to Michael F.) The men over at Pyromaniacs do excellent work. Read them regularly. Today, Dan Phillips posted "Are You Sure You Want a Husband Who...".  Don't miss it.

Wives and mothers working outside the home...

(Tim) Reading a discussion that's developed under an earlier post concerning the Biblical priority of the home and family in the lives of Christian women, it occurred to me to post these notes from a sermon I've preached several times over the course of my ministry. The issue is critically important, and yet not to be dealt with in a wooden way. Specifically, some work outside the home is always required of wives and mothers and is good and right--Biblical, even...

Eat a bagel, the civil magistrate kidnaps your baby...

(Tim, w/thanks to a brother) Over and over, I warn Christian fathers and mothers that each community's child protective services pose a terrible threat to our covenant children. Since twenty-five years ago when we lived in rural Wisconsin and a dear godly pastor and his wife had their son kidnapped by the state, to the past few years when our church and family have had the state threaten four of our families with the loss of their children, it's only becoming more clear each year that the state is not content to have our children in their schools to be indoctrinated from age five through eighteen. They will come after our children at home, also, and kidnap them from their father and mother after getting one anonymous phone call from a malicious neighbor, an officious nurse, a jealous lesbian, or a practicing witch who hates Christ and is delighted to torment his sons and daughters at the place of their greatest vulnerability.

We must do everything possible to oppose this growing threat to our precious children and grandchildren. Remember C. S. Lewis' warning that they'll tell us we can have our religion in private and then make sure we're never alone.

The suffering of children growing up in homes where they are the objects of physical and sexual and spiritual torment is horrible, crying out to God Almighty for His intervention. But to adress these problems in a way that undercuts the authority and love of the children's natural sovereigns given them by God...

PCA pastor calls for more state control over home...

(Tim) As I've mentioned before, one of the most important journals for elders, pastors, and Titus 2 women to read as we shepherd God's flock and our own families is the Howard Center's "Family in America." (Full disclosure: my longtime friend, Bob Patterson, edits the journal.)

In order to live and lead "wise as serpents and harmless as doves," we should spend time studying our culture. There's no issue pastors, elders, deacons, fathers, and mothers of covenant children should study more carefully than the interface between the church, her families, and the civil magistrate--an area of the public square commonly referred to as family policy.

Recently, a friend of mine who's stated clerk of Central Indiana Presbytery (PCA) wrote an oped piece for his local paper calling for more review and discipline of homeschoolers by state government:

What do we do with home schools?

Leave them alone? Regulate them? Ban them?

...So I ask: is it in the interests of the state, to keep an eye on this? I say yes....

Let her works praise her in the gates...

(Tim) For some forty years, now--during all the years I've loved her daughter, Mary Lee--Mom Taylor has been one of my heroines. A couple weeks ago, Mary Lee and I travelled back to Wheaton to attend a banquet held in Mom's honor by the Crowell Trust upon the occassion of the Trust awarding Mom their Susan Coleman Crowell Award.

Mary Lee is number nine of ten and her next older sibling, Mrs. Bob (Gretchen) Worcester, gave a short sketch of Mom's life and character. She did such a good job, I asked if she would send a copy of what she'd said.

Here then is Gretchen's bio of Mom. All of us in the Taylor clan rise up and call Mom blessed. May our Heavenly Father continue to provide His covenant children with such godly mothers as He provided us in Margaret West Taylor. (And for the record, our next to youngest, Hannah Weeks, just gave birth to Mom's forty-seventh great grandchild, and Lord willing, any day now our eldest, Heather Ummel, will give birth to Mom's forty-eighth (Mary Lee's and my tenth grandchild).

* * *

Tribute to Mom – Susan Coleman Crowell Award

I’ve been asked to share about our mom tonight from a family perspective – how she has been influential as a wife and mother.

The first thing to understand about Margaret Taylor as a wife and mother is that she was married to the same man for 65 years, and that she raised 10 children! Those are both amazing numbers! But probably even more amazing than the number of children was our spacing.

Lady Education...

(Tim) Over on ClearNote Ladies Blog, our daughter, Michal Louise Crum, did a post titled, Do Women Need Less Education Than Men? If Samuel Johnson was right in his observation that you know you've hit your mark when you get a response, Michal hit the bull's eye.

At the center of her post were three questions she recommended to her readers in connection with the decision whether or not to go to college:

1. What is the purpose? What is this education preparing me for?
2. What are my motives? Am I pursuing education for the sake of education itself, a profession, money, status, the glory of God?
3. How much will it cost? Is it a wise investment of time, money, and energy? If God leads me in a different direction two years down the road, will the debt incurred prevent me from obeying God’s call?

Pretty calm, huh? It's hard to imagine these questions eliciting screeches and howls--from women who claim the Name of Christ no less. But elicit they did. May I say how much I admire the women of our congregation? If you read the comments under Michal's post, you'll better understand why. For one thing, what grace under fire!

So what about ye olde college education?

I've read all the screeches and howls, and this is by far my favorite...

Arrogate authority; it's what the state does...

(Tim, w/thanks to Tim/Anne) The United Nations is so corrupt, not one smallest part of our nation should be under its authority. Yet our civil servants would like to adopt the United Nation's Convention on the Rights of the Child.

Oppose it here for all the reasons you wish, but especially that this is one more step down the already well-traveled path of government usurping the sacrosanct authority God has delegated to parents over their own flesh and blood.

God has ordained fathers and mothers as their child's natural sovereigns, and unless godly parents rise up against government's exploding encroachment, we'll soon find ourselves unable to make decisions about our children's education, obey Scripture's commands concerning their discipline, bring to term our unborn babies with genetic deficiencies, and on it goes.

And of course, I won't miss the opportunity to point out...

An Homerican Gothic...

(Tim) One of our Homeschooling couples was leaving church last Sunday morning and someone saw they were having an unusual moment of levity and he snapped this pic. At first when I saw it I thought the husband was pregnant, but then I realized he's just fat.

Sadly, this wonderful couple's tried and tried to open up their home for ministry, but every time they've invited someone over for one of their lutefisk dinners, they get turned down. It makes them very sad.

We think the people turning down their invitations do so at least partly because of their weird dress, but really it's not any weirder than the Pentecostals or Gothardites. If you have any suggestions, please send them to me privately. Thanks.

Are you a Homeschooler or a homeschooler?

(Tim) As I've said any number of times, there are Homeschoolers and there are homeschoolers. I don't support the former, but I'm all for the latter. How to tell the difference?

The Homeschooler sees her home as a fortress rather than a center of ministry. Publicly, she speaks much of her husband's authority and how much she loves to submit to it, but privately...

Recovering the little schoolhouse...

"In Fortress Home School, the mother contends with her older boys. No matter who prevails, this contest has no winners. The mother risks overpowering her son or ending every day in frustration and bitterness."

(Tim) Several families here in Church of the Good Shepherd have been working together to found a Christian school that honors God by being led and substantively taught by the fathers of the household. This school also is committed to teaching the doctrines of Scripture that are avoided by mainstream Christian schools who must not provide any instruction that might appear sectarian.

This past week, I was speaking with one of the fathers and he told me of an e-mail written by another father and circulated among the board members of this school that had inspired him. I asked for a copy and if I could post it here on Baylyblog...

Some explanation of the dearth of posts, recently...

(Tim) So where have I been? Busy.

We have been showing and trying to sell our house. May God be pleased to allow it to sell soon.

Then this past week, our youngest son, Taylor, Mary Lee, and I moved into a new house. About three years ago, it became clear to us we no longer wanted to live on Bloomington's east side (Target, Macy's, Borders, professors, and wealth), so we began looking for a home to buy out here on the west side (Lowes, Aldi, Sam's Club, and Walmart). Key considerations were our new church building being just outside city limits and all but one of our grandchildren living within a mile or two of our new home out here on the west side.

The problem was there were very few homes on this side of town built to accommodate large family and church meal fellowship by a large kitchen and dining/living room. So, you guessed it: we built our new home. It's not our dream house, but living in it is a dream and we're exhausted and happy for this gift given us by God through Mike Boles and his excellent suppliers and craftsmen. Mike and his wife, Lisa, gave us the general contracting work as a kindness to one of their pastors, and this is one of the most loving gifts we've ever received...

Naturally, unbelievers are opposed to discipline...

(Tim, w/thanks to David L.) While we're on the subject of "Duh!" studies, Pediatrics just released a study demonstrating that medical doctors and their researchers think the word 'hit' (as in "parents who hit their child") is synonymous with the word 'spank' (as in "parents who spank their child").

Time reports:

Compared with children who were not hit, those who were spanked were more likely to be defiant, demand immediate satisfaction of their wants and needs, get frustrated easily, have temper tantrums and lash out physically against others.

Rather than spanking, the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends "time outs."

And now a pastoral word to parents: if you're not inclined to trust paleontologists on the age of the earth or women's studies professors on the meaning of femininity, why would you trust your pediatrician on raising godly Covenant children?

In all sorts of areas of our lives, our choice is...

John Piper does even more good work...

(Tim) Speaking of the weaknesses of godly church officers, Jake Mentzel just passed this on:

* * *

You may have already seen this, but yesterday on his blog, John Piper announced an extended leave of absence (May 1-December 31) from...

Degreed, but only rarely pregnant...

(Tim) Over at ClearNote Blog, my number two daughter, Michal Louise Crum, has people gasping for breath with her modest proposal that a college education isn't a prerequisite for godliness or contentment. Poor benighted Michal, barefoot but not pregnant. The most intense hissy fits are over at the bump: the inside scoop on pregnancy. Take a gander.

A wonderful anniversary present to Mom and Pop Hitchens...

(Tim, w/thanks to Josh Congrove) Peter Hitchens has provided such a good set of reasons for the hope that is within him (and sadly, not in his brother, Christopher) that I abstain from comment and simply post the link. So many wonderfully wise and beautiful things here, I can't bear to mention only one.

Thank you, brother Peter. We will pray for your dear brother, Christopher.

(Peter's book, The Rage Against God: How Atheism Led Me to Faith, will be issued this coming Monday, March 15th.)

CORRECTION: The Rage Against God is now planned for release in early May.

The pleasures of patriarchy, part II

How many times have we checked our Facebook page to see who has responded to a recent status update (“Vanity, vanity, all is vanity!”)? How often have we opened a cupboard door, looking for something to pop into our mouths to enliven our spirits as the day drags on? -Anne Jones

(Tim) A wise wife and mother writing under the pen name Anne Jones posted The pleasures of patriarchy, part II on the ClearNote Blog a few days ago, following up on her earlier post, The pleasures of patriarchy, part I. Here's a teaser:

This series of blog posts, as the title indicates, is about how women of God can, should, and must enjoy the pleasures of patriarchy. Last time, I promised that “for the next several months, Lord willing, we will look at how patriarchy is a place of pleasure for God’s woman.”

We will do that… but not this month. This month, we are going to take a step backward and consider if pleasure itself is worth pursuing, whether within patriarchy or anywhere else.

If you love Scripture, the word “pleasure” most likely sets off some fairly loud alarms in your spiritual ears. The Word of God is filled with warnings against pursuing pleasure...

Top ten books on sex...

(Tim, w/thanks to Mick) Here's a top-ten reading list for those looking to reform their understanding of the meaning and purpose of the sexes as God created them.

1. Scripture, starting with these texts
2. Henrik Ibsen: A Doll's House
3. Paul King Jewett: Man as Male and Female
4. Stephen B. Clark: Man and Woman in Christ
5. Walter Neuer: Man and Woman in Christian Perspective
6. Steven Ozment: When Fathers Ruled
7. G. K. Chesterton: What's Wrong With the World or The Thing
8. Doug Wilson: Reforming Marriage
9. George Eliot: Middlemarch
10. Ivan Turgenev: Fathers and Sons

Now, ten explanations...

Tim Tebow and Jim Dobson: "He was my friend, faithful and just to me"...

He was my friend, faithful and just to me:
But Brutus says he was ambitious;
And Brutus is an honourable man….
When that the poor have cried, Caesar hath wept:
Ambition should be made of sterner stuff:
Yet Brutus says he was ambitious;
And Brutus is an honourable man.

(Tim, w/thanks to many) Like Allan Bloom's The Closing of the American Mind, Jim Dobson's breakout book, Dare to Discipline, was rejected by many publishers before one gave it a try--in Dobson's case, my father-in-law's Tyndale House Publishers. Later, Dad Taylor gave money to Jim to do a radio show, and the rest is history.

I am not ashamed of Dr. James Dobson. Rather, I've long expressed my deep gratitude for Jim's work on the air and in print. Few men have contributed so much Biblical instruction to my flocks. When the history of the late twentieth century is written, it will become clear Jim was one of the most courageous warriors for truth and mercy and justice in these United States.

You may have noticed on this blog that I've never mentioned the name of that publication in Wheaton calling itself Christianity Today. One reason is their sotto voce attacks on Jim Dobson. Among Wheaton's detelligentsia, it's hip to smirk when Dobson's name comes up, and CT has taken its cue and place among the pea-shooters.

This has been very discouraging for Jim; it's hurt him, his wife Shirley, and their children.

I can hear the exclamations: "Hello! How does Tim Keller feel about your criticism, dude? Something about the splinter and the log!"

Fair enough...

Training your toddler to battle porn...

(Tim) Here's the beginning of a post by Michael Foster from our ClearNote Fellowship Blog:

* * *

The battle against porn starts while your son is still in diapers…

"Practically in shackles..."

(Tim) In response to the post, "The Pleasures of Patriarchy, part 1," over on ClearNote Women's Blog, my daughter Hannah Weeks wrote something that strengthened my faith. I hope it will yours, too.

* * *

Why aren’t you taking advantage of your blessed condition of having been born in an age in which you have the freedom to get an education, make something of yourself, make a difference in the world, and enjoy the opportunities that are available to you today but were unavailable to your grandmother in her day?

I was just standing at my stove this evening, working on dinner, and thanking God that I'm not where I was a little over a year ago...

Of trees and marriage...

(Tim) This from David Wegener who teaches church history, theology, and Scripture at the Theological College of Central Africa under the PCA's Mission to the World. Terri is David's wife and John his son.

* * *

Many days in our rainy season follow a pattern. It is very hot and sunny during the day but toward late afternoon, the sky clouds over and we will have an evening rainstorm. On December 10th it was a little different.

Terri came into my room around 5:30pm and asked if I wanted to let Mr. Robby go home early so he could beat the rain. As I walked outside, Robby was rushing around. I asked if he wanted to go home now and he said he thought he’d stay.

I could tell why. The rain had already started and something sounded like a train coming from over our back fence...

The pleasures of patriarchy, part I...

(Tim) A wise wife and mother writing under the pen name Anne Jones posted The Pleasure of Patriarchy, part I on the ClearNote Blog a few days ago. Here's a teaser.

* * *

Patriarchy has a bad name these days. In most circles, saying of a man, “He’s so patriarchal” can only be topped by saying “He’s such a Neanderthal,” because most 21st-century people, even those within Christ’s own church, assume that patriarchy is not only outdated, but backward, out of touch, and—more to the point—wrong.

Of course, the Holy Scriptures through which God chose to reveal Himself were all penned within the context and limits of patriarchy (which means, literally, “father rule”). He chose to send His Son to a world where women bore and raised babies and men provided for families with the labor of their hands. (Even the most dedicated religious feminist...

Pornography and faith...

(Tim) These wise words were made as a comment under the recent post, Stats on internet pornography, by Alex McNeilly, a young sax student in Church of the Good Shepherd. Thank you, Alex.

* * *

Regardless of how guarded any home is against sin, particularly the sexual sin of the media, in the world opportunities to indulge in it will abound. But even as we build larger and stronger walls against these sins in the home, worldly access to them becomes ever more available as we see in the stats in this post. As a result, I agree with Kevin that the strongest defense against these things lies in the spiritual battle.

We must teach our children the dangers of sexual sin and pornography, so that when they go into the world (a friend's house, a computer lab, a video store, etc.), where there are no guards, their hearts will already be fortified against these iniquities...

"I yuv you, dwamma"...

(Tim) Responding to the post The invisible woman and its comments, one Titus 2 (older) woman wrote:

I recently heard from an old classmate, sombody who knew me as a teen and with whom I have had no contact for thirty five years. Having asked her to tell me about herself and her life, I received a letter telling of her early marriage that lasted seven years and ended in divorce. The marriage produced one child and so years of single parenting were combined with continuing education in pursuit of the sheepskin attesting to her qualification for the career of her choice. That career, however, turned out to be less than a "dream come true," and she shared that, having recently remarried a successful businessman who would appear to have significant material wealth, she joyfully abandoned her chosen career to work full time in her husband's office.

Her daughter is grown, upwardly mobile, and living in New York City. Her husband's children are adults. So, when her obligations in his office are fulfilled, her life revolves around travel, charity work, exercise, and entertaining. She plays the accordion, she participated in a beauty pageant last year and intends to do so again this year. (This at the age of 56!) They do triathlons together, snowmobile, and enjoy the lakes in the summer...

Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow...

(Tim) Our extended family came up to what we call the Michigan House to celebrate Christmas. We arrived in batches Wednesday and Thursday, and are leaving in batches yesterday and tomorrow (Saturday and Monday). The first pic is of Ben and Michal's youngest--Zion Bjorn. I tell them they spelled it wrong--that "this one is Zion Born"--but they don't listen.

The house bubbled with chidren. Here Joseph reads a book to four while the others are...somwhere else. Eating, taking a nap, in the bathtub, nursing, having their diapers changed, eating, having their nose wiped, eating, playing ping pong, eating, and asking questions--Josiah's specialty.

The invisible woman...

(Tim) My friend Bob Patterson forwarded a pre-release copy of the Winter 2010 issue of The Family in America: A Journal of Public Policy which he edits, and it's the point of this essay to get you to subscribe. For many years I've been reading this and other publications of what is now called the Howard Center for Family, Religion, and Society, and they've been foundational to my work as a preacher, pastor, and father.

This particular issue's cover article details how, over the past thirty years, homemakers have been forced to subsidize the lives of privilege lived by other women who have forsaken marriage, the home, and childbearing for degrees and professions.

Professional women with salaries high enough to allow them to pay for day care and still turn a profit have not simply been content to leave their homemaking sisters behind, but have built their lifestyle on the backs of those sisters and their hardworking husbands. To anyone who matters, these homemakers are invisible.

Equal Employment Opportunity laws have piled up a legacy of systemic injustice throughout the wage earning world, leaving half the fairer and weaker sex to raise the children the other half will depend upon for their Medicare and Social Security payments when their life of childless privilege is drawing to an end. Meanwhile, the husbands of these housewives and mothers are in free-fall, trying to support the mother of their children as she gives herself to work that, despite those bright boys and girls in Economics Departments, still hasn't shown up on their gross domestic profit tally sheets...

But it's really his sin, too...

(Tim) This from a godly mother repenting of the sins of her feminist youth. As I see it, she was so much older then, she's younger than that now. Anyhow, she reports this conversation between her children as she read to them:

"After hearing the Grimm's tale "The Fisherman and His Wife" (about a discontented wife and an emasculated husband) my four-year-old daughter said, "She does NOT have a gentle and quiet spirit, does she? I don't think she loves Jesus at all." Then my eight-year-old son replied, "but it's really his sin too, because he isn't telling her NO to all the silly things she wants!"

Home births, women in combat, and men in delivery rooms...

(Tim) Yes, I was there at each of our children's births. And yes, I wanted to be with my wife during her hardest work and greatest suffering. Having seen and felt its terrible joy and sorrow, I've wondered how men could be so heartless as to ask women to go to war a second time, on the battlefield. I mean you'd think the suffering and bloodshed of childbirth, followed by perpetual demands of nursing and childrearing, would give our mothers a pass when it comes to defending the homeland. Shouldn't the agony of national defense be born by the sex that escapes childbirth's agony? Maybe I'm a simpleton but it seems only natural to me.

On a related theme, I don't think women should watch war movies like Saving Private Ryan that accurately depict the battlefield's suffering and bloodshed. Men go to war to save women from this obscenity. Why would we want the fairer sex to experience the carnage we bear for their protection?

These thoughts sparked by this article detailing a French obstetrician's argument that the best environment for childbirth is a quiet room with a calm and unobtrusive midwife in attendance. I couldn't agree more, along with a loving mother or her surrogate (a doula).

Back in 1976 after asking the chief pediatric surgeon at Children's Memorial Hospital what he thought of home births, Mary Lee gave birth to our first at home. The good doctor was a personal friend and responded, "It's safer than the hospital," so our parents didn't oppose our plan. After initial skepticism, some of our friends and relatives took to the idea and as the years passed more children were born at home attended by a midwife...

Fatherhood, the dread of responsibility, and childbearing...

(Tim, w/thanks to Bob and Brian) At church the other day, I was talking with Bob Sands, a young father of ten or twenty (I've lost track), and he mentioned another man in our congregation, Brian Bailey, had sent him a link to a book on Google Book that he'd found very helpful titled The Dread of Responsibility by Emile Faguet.

"The dread of responsibility," I thought, "that's the perfect summary of leaders today--teachers, principals, professors, judges, senators, presidents, and of course, pastors, elders, deacons, fathers, and husbands. All of us have a dread of responsibility."

Bob told me the book emphasized the courage fatherhood required and I was reminded of a quote I've used at times that says something like, "The father of a family is the world's first and greatest adventurer."

So today, I went and read the part of the book Brian had recommended...